The guy immediately makes good on his promise to drink and sleep his way through Scotland.
Thats right, you guys, Scotland is all shook up.
Things are bad for the people there, and Marys ability to lead is fully on display.
Credit: Ben Mark Holzberg/The CW
If shes unable to provide for her ailing country, her people will turn on her.
Darnleys been banished to his familys estate so as not to cause trouble for Mary at court.
Oh, hell give Mary that money to help the people of Scotland, hes no monster.
But in return, he wants to be allowed back at court hes no angel either.
Mary has a pow-wow with Team Good Hair.
Obviously, its not going to be that easy.
At the great feast, Darnley hams it up for his adoring fans.
Darnleys been spending that money at an alarming rate.
Greer and Rizzio, though they be but pretty people, are terrible at stalling.
Before long, Darnleys on his way.
It looks like it hurts…a lot.
Darnley returns and tosses Lord Ponytail in jail.
Marys had enough of her husbands shenanigans.
He is actively working against his wife to bolster his own power.
Marys got no time for that.
A TALE AS OLD AS TIME.
Even with a pummeled face, this guy is handsome!
Hes also very doom and gloom: Darnley will always be a threat to Marys reign.
They need to take him out.
Marys not ready to order the murder of her husband…yet.
Also, they hold hands!
Talking about possible murder has never been so adorable!
Oh, it is so on, Darnley.
Things are equally as dire over in France.
Catherines spell to make Charles a stronger king has worked a little too well.
Hes shooting arrows at Henri and making terrible political decisions.
For instance, hes informed of two ex-pat English nobles living in France and refusing to pay French taxes.
It all seems to go according to plan, and Catherine has saved the day once again.
Except it doesnt go according to plan things go very, very poorly.
Yeah, things have escalated quickly.
Catherine and Co. are aghast at what they are seeing.
Catherine blames herself for what shes done to her son.
Youre my girl, Catherine, but maybe next time pump the brakes a little on summoning the occult.
Speaking of pumping the brakes, we should talk about Claude and Luc.
So, she seduces Luc (its not difficult).
If youre keeping count, Claude is in love with two men, but has a relationship with zero.
Times are tough for the Valois women!
Meanwhile, in England:Lifes a beach, man.
He has the perfect secluded beach cottage for a sexy weekend off the royal clock.
Liz makes up some story about needing a sabbatical for prayer and reflection, and off she goes.
Fearing Jane may out the secret lovebirds, Elizabeth takes a swift oar to Janes head.
Shes seen too much, per Elizabeth.
The girl has got to go.
Love is weird, you guys.
Thankfully, he doesnt have to do Elizabeths dirty work this time.
Elizabeth truly is a merciful queen.
Elizabeth is relieved for about three seconds.
When she returns to the castle, who should be there but Jane.
She had nowhere else to go and she wants to prove to Liz that she is a trustworthy servant.
Elizabeth basically says,its your head, and lets her stay.
Youd think Liz would be a little more hesitant to trust strangers, but sure.
That oar to the skull was totally worth it.
A lady requires excellent sartorial support for both types of occasions!
